Tagged and Tagging

This week I was ‘Twitter Tagged’ by @rachelradiostar who blogs at Eternally 28.  She’d answered questions posed by Arwedd at Stepping out in Faith.

As I’ve given 11 facts about myself many times before, I won’t bore you with more so I’ve left that part out. I also decided to take a hotchpotch of both Rachel and Arwedd’s questions as I’d already covered some of the others in the past.  Here goes:

First crush - who and would you now?

I was desperately in love with Richard O’Sullivan from ‘Man About the House'.  I was convinced I’d marry him and, NO, I most definitely wouldn’t now!!

Most expensive single thing you have bought except houses/cars.

Cheating a little bit now but the most expensive thing I own is my engagement ring.  I never tire of looking at it and it fills my heart with joy - worth every penny.  I tried to find a picture but had no luck - it’s a true lover’s knot, set with 12 diamonds.

Your first memory.

Sitting on my potty watching ‘Crossroads’ - glam, huh?!

What was your best subject at school?

A bit predictable but it was English - I always had my head stuck in a book and loved writing stories.  In my day (!) if you wrote a really good ‘composition’ you were allowed to go to the Headmaster and get an ink star stamped on your forehead which you would proudly wear for as long as you could get away without washing!

Have you had your 15 minutes of fame yet?

Yes but I really hope I have more to come.  My short stint in ‘Grange Hill’ saw me featuring in the local paper and all the schoolboys in the area wanted to date me!  In the following clip, I can be seen with very attractive ‘spaniel ears’ perm and brown checked skirt!

'Golden balls' (TV Programme) - would you split or steal?

I’ve never seen a whole episode but it drives me nuts when people steal from their opponents.  I would be totally honest and trusting and would most definitely split.

Do you like Marmite?

I couldn’t live without it.  I use it in gravies and sauces and it’s the one thing I can face eating when I feel unwell.  I always said that if I had a child who didn’t like it, I’d send them back.  Thankfully, my son passed the test.

What story does your family always tell about you?

I am constantly reminded that I was left on the doorstep with the milk.  I wasn’t.  I had older sisters who loved to wind me up.  They have scarred me for life!

Do you bother with Christmas crackers?

Of course!  We all love a bit of tat, don’t we?  Funny story here … one New Year’s Eve my friend ‘Fenella’ called just before we were due to arrive for dinner and asked if I had any crackers.  I arrived with my box of Carr’s Water Biscuits when really she’d meant the pulling variety.

 

What’s your favourite body part and why?

I like my nails because I look after them and treat them well and my legs because they're quite slim and treat me well!

In the lead-up to the release of my Christmas novella (1^st December) I’m tagging four fellow Twitterers with the following festive questions - Michelle Betham, Donna Trinder, Lacey Dearie and Jamie Dougan.

1. What was your best ever Christmas present as a child?
2. How old were you when you began to suspect that Father Christmas may not be real?
3. What would your ideal Christmas involve?
4. Which is your favourite part of the festive season?
5. Have you ever watched the Queen’s speech?
6. Does the Christmas prep fill you with excitement or dread?
7. What would you LOVE to find under your tree this year?
8. Turkey lover or not?
9. Is there anything you eat at Christmas that you never have at any other time of year?
10. You have one wish on a blessed Christmas star - what is it?

Hope you guys enjoy those and that they help to get you into the spirit of things.

Remember ‘Stilettos & Stubble’ is out on 28^th November and ‘Christmas Deliverance’ is out on 1^st December.  My other 3 books are available at Amazon and Lulu.

Fifty Shades of Marmite

I had a funny conversation with my mum a couple of weeks ago.  It went something like this:

MUM:  Ooh, there’s this new book out that everyone’s talking about.  It’s meant to be brilliant.

ME:  That will probably be the ‘Fifty Shades’ books.

MUM:  They say it’s saving peoples’ marriages.

ME:  It’s porn.

MUM: Oh.  Is it selling well?

ME:  Incredibly well.

MUM:  Why couldn’t you have written it?

Yes, my 84 year old mother, who has read my books and knows my style, asked me why I hadn’t written about bondage and the likes!  Very open minded, my mother.

So ‘Fifty Shades’, eh?  What can I say that hasn’t been said before?

I read the sample available on Amazon and didn’t like the writing style.  I haven’t read any of the juicy bits but, when a close friend told me she chucked it in the recycling after reading a third of it, I’m not likely to. We joked that it’s now ‘Fifty Shades of Brown, Green and Sludge’.

I guess it was always going to be a Marmite book - there will be those that do and those that don’t - but what will EL James care?  She must be laughing all the way to Anne Summers. And jolly good luck to her, I say, although I’m still slightly astonished by its meteoric rise to fame.  What made it stand out against the plethora of erotica on Amazon?  I mean you can’t move for whips, chains and other paraphernalia.  And I hear that publishers are looking out for the next new James - well, they need to get themselves on Amazon and check out all the Indie writers who are doing their bit for S&M.

So whilst I’m not in a position to review the book, I can pass comment on a very stupid remark made on the recent documentary about it.  The name of the person escapes me but I was left reeling by their stupidity.

‘Women are crying out for non-consensual sex’.

Excuse me?  You try telling that to working or knackered mums.  And let’s get this totally straight. Non-consensual sex is rape.  If you’re not giving your consent to have sex, you are being abused.  If you're pretending not to give your consent, then it’s called role play.

Two totally different things.  One illegal and one enjoyable.

And in answer to my mother’s question, I don’t write porn because I’m too nice!  My books leave the sex firmly at the bedroom door (and not always in the bedroom). My heroines are sexy, feisty women with healthy sexual appetites but I don’t want to ram it down my readers’ throats - so to speak.

If the ‘Fifty Shades’ series is saving peoples’ marriages - great, I’m very happy for them.  I’ve been told my ‘Mummy Misfit’ books have made women realise that they’re not alone in their insecurities and that suits me just fine.  And I also received a review entitled ‘Not Fifty Shades of Awful’, which really made me smile.

Right, I’m off to see if I can come up with a plot for a novel where Libby and Fenella open up a lap-dancing club.

Just to please my mum!

Check out my THREE books on Amazon and Lulu.  Humour and love without a whip in sight.  Oh no, that's a lie - a whip features slightly in 'THE DARKER SIDE OF MUMMY MISFIT' but not in THAT way!