On the Sofa with Shane Henderson

On my sofa today is footballer Shane Henderson. Shane has just recently returned to his boyhood heroes, Milton Keynes Rangers after a few years away, playing with local rivals Daventry United.  You can read his story in Jamie Tucker Dougan's novella 'Offside!'

So, Shane, your friendship with Mia, your new boss, is very close. Have you ever considered taking it to another level and do you think she has? 

[*Turns red and shuffles on the nervously on the sofa*] I better watch what I’m saying here… Yes, I have… and I know she has too. But our lives took different paths and other than that one special time we shared, we’ve been happy being very close friends.

April is clearly a good looking lady - if she was an animal, what would she be? What would you be?

She would be a fox, sexy but equally sneaky. I guess I would be a dog. A good friend and mostly loyal.

What would a favourite night out be for you and April?

Well that's a bit hard to answer. We have different ideas of a good night out. April likes the party atmosphere and being the centre of attention in a crowd, so nightclubbing would be her favourite night out. I tend to shun the spotlight and media attention that follows Premiership footballers. A quiet night away at a country hotel and a nice meal suits me more.

You grew up very close to Mia's family - do you think that would have been the case if you'd been closer to your own?

The Rodrigues family are a lovely family. I think they’d welcome anyone. But I was like the son they never had I think. If I’d been closer to my own family, then things might have been different. I don’t think the age gap between Lewis and I helped the relationship we had. But we’re making up for that now.

When you hang your footballer's boots up, what will we see Shane doing next?

I think I’ll definitely stay in the world of football. Maybe management, I quite fancy being the Boss of MKR one day.

Would you appear in 'Big Brother' or 'I'm a Celebrity'? 

Definitely not ‘Big Brother’, I couldn’t cope being penned in with a load of attention seeking divas. I get enough of that with April!
I’d love to do ‘I’m a Celebrity’. Creepy crawlies don’t bother me and I’d be up for any Bush Tucker Trial.

Is it hard to abstain from fleshly delights before a match and have you ever ignored the rules and regretted it? Does it really make a difference? 

Ah, are you asking if I’ve broken the pre-match sex ban that some managers impose? Well, that would be yes. All I’ll say is that if you’re fit enough, then it makes no difference.

Talking of fit, what are your thoughts on David Beckham and would you like the fame and fortune that football has brought him or are you just in it for the love? 

David Beckham is a great ambassador for the game and for sport in general. He’s good role model for youngster starting out in the game too. As for his fame and fortune, well I’ll pass on the fame. I play football for the love of the game, nothing else. The fortune, well I’m a Premiership footballer. I have all the fortune I’ll ever need.

Thanks for joining me Shane - an afternoon on the sofa with a sexy footballer was just what the doctor ordered.

You can follow Shane's creator on Twitter @JamieTDougan
Read his blog here and buy his other books here

Misfit and Son on TV!

Oh boy, today was the day!  Our big TV debut.

Who would have thought that my son's crippling condition of school phobia would lead to me writing five books, featuring in the Daily Mail, on BBC Radio London and THEN ITV's This Morning.

I'm so proud of my young man - from all of the bad, so much good has featured in our lives and today really proved that.

So ... I was up at 6am today ready for our cab to ITV at 7.45, in the vain hope that my face might wake up!  Mum Fail #1!

Son fell out of bed at 7.10, bright eyed and bushy tailed - not an ounce of nerves in sight! Point to Son #1.

Arrived at the studios to the friendliest security man in living history, instantly put at ease in my sleepy and nervy state.

Directed through sets and storage area to lift - Mum Fail #2 - I hate lifts.  Son told me not to be daft and so I got in.  Point to Son #2.

And it's such a glam lift, how could I resist?

Me looking like I need a nappy change - just a tad scared by now.  Mum Fail #3

ITV coffee and croissants, toast or biscuits before make-up

One view of the Green Room and the TV hubbie watched us on.

The framed photo to the left of the TV says,

'Please Tweet your performance on ITV's This Morning'

Love it!

I have to say what a lovely bunch of people work at This Morning - we were made to feel welcome from the minute we arrived and everyone was just so happy!  People who love their jobs and want to be there - special thanks to the lovely Flo, in particular.  Son was so impressed, he's already been invited to send his CV in as he really wants to work there (BBC and ITV now!)  Point to Son #3.

OK, so next I headed off to make-up.  Lovely ladies but I will never let you near me again.  You may have tried to curl my hair but you will soon realise it has a mind of its own and please don't cake me with STUFF! Mum Fail #4.

With my boy - coffee #1

This is where we hit Mum Fail #5  - weak bladder!  Off I went to the loo ... and got lost.  It's a big place, ITV! So Point to Son #4 - who then had to take me to the loo and bring me back each time.  His comment?  'Mum!  Please don't make me do this!  It makes me look clingy!'  Extra Point to Son #5  for humour and putting me at ease! How the tables turn!

Cool, laid back son - tweeting and chilled.

Hilarious!  I was guided here to smoke, in the non smoking area.

Go figure!

Piles of fag ends at my feet!

So ... then we had our tour of the studio.  Sooo tiny and really weird to see it when you've watched the programme on and off for so many years (throughout the whole of my pregnancy and breast feeding!!!).

We shared the Green Room with David Mellor and Tom Parker-Bowles (or Tom Parker Meat-Bowles, as son has now renamed him after he cooked horse free meatballs on the show!)  Point to Son #6.  Liz Fraser was also there - fellow Twitterer and author - but I didn't get the chance to say hello.  Mum fail #6. We have since Tweeted one another and promised to say Hi, if I'm ever invited back!

And then it was 10.45 - the ad break and time for us to head to the set for our slot.  Phil and Holly were lovely and SO eager to make us feel comfortable - kisses and hugs all round and a quick chat about our interview and ... BAM!  they were into it!  Unbelievably cool, calm, professional - Philip is so cute and Holly is glamour personified (like a lovely dolly fresh from the box).

The interview was over in a flash - I have now had the chance to watch it and I  feel so very proud of my lovely young man.  He was confident and well spoken and he made my heart swell with pride.  Point to Son #7.  I, on the other hand, looked like a woman attacked by fear and a make-up artist.  Mum fail #7.

All those hours of panic were over and we headed back to the Green Room for coffee.  LOOK at the mug they gave me!!!

And we were then given these signed photos to complete our morning out:

The Silver Fox

And the lovely Holly Willer-Boobie!

Our cab brought us home and we were just in time to watch it on ITV+1.  Bad move!  I was cringing and moaning about how old and YUCK I  looked.  Mum fail #8.

Son said, 'Yep, I looked OK.' and disappeared to Tweet and play on the computer without a second thought.  Point to Son #8.

And then of course, we had the 'haters'!  Amongst all the wonderfully positive comments on the show and on Twitter, you will always get those without a brain cell.  This is old hat to us now - been there, done that.  We've clearly helped so many people to start talking about their own experiences, I'm now past caring.

My final point would be this.  Some may think that school phobia is just a 'label' but it's a very real feeling - it's not naughtiness, petulance or 'trying it on'.  My son was not bullied or lazy - PLEASE people, listen!  I just pray you never face anything like it in your lives - karma will be your reward.

And to all of you who have supported us along the way and those who have spoken out or asked for advice, I thank you and I wish you well.

Look at the son I have to show for it now!  #SonWins