More About The Misfit

This week I’m continuing with a series of questions posed to me by a Twitter pal, @jackie495.  You can read the last interview here.  Jackie and I met on Twitter a few months back and instantly hit it off.  After meeting face to face, we regularly have a gossip on the phone and we’ll be getting together again in November - the joy of social networking, where faceless people become real friends!

These are the things Jackie wanted to know about Mummy Misfit:

What’s your favourite colour?

Black, every time!  The majority of my wardrobe is black.  It’s slimming, classy and can be dressed up or down.  A nightmare for cat and dog hair though!

We've all had weird dreams Amanda, but what’s the weirdest dream you’ve ever had?

The most peculiar dream I ever had was when I was about five or six.  There are some local shops just around the corner from us and every time we go there the dream still comes back to me vividly.  I was being chased around the area by a giant gollywog and he was laughing in a really menacing way.  This dream has stayed with me for 43 years - and still makes me shiver.  The weird thing is I LOVED gollywogs when I was growing up and I had a huge collection of them.  Why would I have a nightmare about them?

A recurring dream - at least once a month - is that I’m on stage and don’t know any of my lines.  It’s horrible!

If you bumped your car into another and the owner wasn't around would you leave your telephone number?

In the words of ‘Rainman’ … ‘I’m an excellent driver!’ so I wouldn’t bump anyone’s car but if I did, of course I’d leave my number - very honest, me!

What’s your favourite joke?

What’s the difference between erotic and kinky?

Erotic is using a feather, kinky is using the whole chicken!

Do you cheat when you play board games or any other kind of game?

No!  I hate cheats and don’t see the point of playing if you have to use underhand tactics.  I do get very stroppy when playing ‘Guitar Hero’ or ‘Buzz’ with hubby and son though.  ‘Guitar Hero’ because son makes me sing songs I don’t know and ‘Buzz’ because I’m always winning until the pie throwing part starts - they always hit me with their pies and I lose all my points! 

Apart from your disgusting smoking habit (ha ha!) do you have any other habits?

Worrying is my worst habit.  I worry about everything.  All of the time.  And I’ll always find something to panic about.  For instance, my books are selling really well  - I should be happy with that, right?  Nope, not me!  I’m already in a flap, thinking about what happens when the sales slow down.  Happily I have a very easy going hubbie who keeps me grounded and talks me back down.

If you were asked to sing a duet with Paul McCartney would you?  And can you actually sing?

I’d love to sing with Sir Paul.  Call me odd but I find him quite tasty!  And, yes, I can hold a tune so I reckon we’d do a good job of it.

What's your favourite film?

I have to be greedy and go for a few here.  ‘Dirty Dancing’, ‘Mamma Mia’, ‘Evita’, ‘It’s a Wonderful Life’, and ‘Shawshank Redemption’.

Where did the inspiration come from to write ‘Stilettos & Stubble’?

I wanted to write about a larger lady - a less than perfect heroine.  Watching Miranda one night, the whole plot popped into my head.  She is my Persephone (people are asking how this is pronounced and it’s ‘Purse - effonie’ but she prefers Percy or Perce).  Putting her in a drag club setting provided heaps of opportunities for humour - and, no, she doesn’t work as a drag queen!  Read the book to find out more - released 28^th November.

If you found a magic lamp, which three wishes would you ask the genie to grant?

Ooh tricky!  I think the simplest option would be health, wealth and happiness.  And one extra, please - to always keep my son safe and guide him to make sensible decisions in life.

Thanks to Jackie for these weird and wonderful questions.  I’m happy to receive any others from my readers and also always willing to do guest blogs.  Leave a comment or DM me on Twitter.

Check out my three books on Amazon and Lulu  - soon to become four!
 

The Next Big Thing

This past week has seen both the Mummy Misfit books in the Top 50 (UK) in PAID humour for Kindle on Amazon!  My free promo days seemed to raise my profile and I’ve been selling more books than ever before!

Good, huh?

So it seems rather appropriate that I should have been tagged by my Indie buddy, Michelle Betham, to introduce to you ‘The Next Big Thing’.

This is where I have the opportunity to answer questions on my current work in progress.  You can read Michelle’s here.

So, here goes. 

What is the working title of your book?

Book Four will be called, ‘Stilettos and Stubble’ ©.  You heard it here first.  The title is mine and no one can pinch it, OK? 

Where did the idea come from for the book?

The world of drag clubs has always fascinated me and I’m a massive fag hag so, once the seed of a plot popped into my head, I grabbed it and ran with it.  I also wanted a less than perfect heroine and watching Miranda Hart one night gave me the perfect inspiration. 

What genre does your book fall under? 

‘Stilettos and Stubble’ will be a rom-com. 

Which actors would you choose to play your characters on screen?

My lead, Persephone (or Percy as she prefers to be called!) would be played by Miranda Hart.  She needs to be larger than life, a little ungainly and an expert at putting herself down. 

You may be surprised to see such a glam picture of Miranda but it needed to be this one for a reason.  Much of the production would see her looking as polished as this - but of course we’d also get to see the scruffy Miranda we’ve grown to know and love!

As for the ‘love interest’ that’s a bit tricky because he needs to be taller than Miranda and strikingly good looking.  Research was fun though and if the lovely Gerard Butler could bulk himself up just a tad more, he’s got the job!

Another vital character in the book is the owner of the drag club, Annie Vestite.  Oh such an easy decision here.  I bring you the fantabulosa Julian Clary.

What is the one-sentence synopsis of your book?

‘It’s what’s inside that counts.’ 

Will your book be self-published or represented by an agency?

I'll remain an Indie writer unless I’m snapped up by an agent I have complete faith in. 

How long did it take you to write the first draft of your manuscript?

I started work in May and I plan to have the first draft finished by mid-October.  The book will be launched at the beginning of December. 

What other books would you compare this story to within your genre?

Hmm, not sure about that one.  I’d like to think it has the humour of Jill Mansell and Sophie Kinsella but it’s something that really hasn’t been done before so, … well … who knows? 

Who or what inspired you to write this book?

Back to Miranda Hart again!  So many books seem to have perfectly petite heroines with high flying careers and men dropping at their feet.  I wanted a ‘real’ woman with failed dreams and ‘issues’. 

What else about your book might pique the reader’s interest?

What’s not to love?  Glitz, glamour, humour, bitching, love and friendship all rolled into one.

So watch this space.  ‘Stilettos and Stubble’ will hit the Amazon and Lulu shelves in December.  And remember, it’s what’s inside that counts!

I now tag two fellow authors and Twitter pals. 

Jamie Dougan - you can find his three books here and currently all proceeds are going to Cancer Research. 

Robert Daws - introducing the 2^nd in his Sullivan and Broderick Mysteries with ‘Poisoned Rock’.  The first in the series is called ‘The Rock’ and can be found here. 

Currently all three of my books are available to buy at Amazon UK and Amazon.com for Kindle.  Also in paperback at Lulu.

When Mummy Met Jackie

I met a fab new Twitterer a few months back and we instantly hit it off.  Our love of musicals and our daft sense of humour united us and, before I knew it, she’d bought all of my books, left great reviews and done her utmost to spread the Mummy Misfit word.  We’re meeting up in September and today we spoke for the first time on the phone.

So @Jackie495 was the perfect choice when I decided I wanted some ‘off the wall’ questions for my blog.  Here we go, and huge thanks to Jackie:

Besides your hubby, who would be your next perfect dinner date and why?

Oh, such a tricky first question!  I’d love a date with Noel Coward (dead), Curtis Stigers (married), Julian Clary (gay), Geoffrey Palmer (too old), Ollie Murs (too young), Simon Cowell (too arrogant).  So I’ll stick with my lovely hubbie!

In your book, 'Diary of a Mummy Misfit’, you mention 'Pink Cocks' - short for cocktails - but would you ask a barman for one?

No!  I’m too nice to ask a barman for a pink cock.  That would be rude.  I’d ask for a ‘White Russian’ - lots of cream!

You're a huge fan of 'Absolutely Fabulous'.  Would you say you're more like Patsy or Edina?  And would you enjoy having their whacky lifestyle 24/7?

I’m definitely Patsy, Sweedie.  And you're my Eds, as you know!  The trouble is, I have two friends who could ‘out-Patsy’ me any day.  And, no, I couldn’t do the whacky lifestyle 24/7 - far too old and need my sleep.

Your followers on Twitter know that you're partial to a glass of wine .... or should that be a crate?!  But have you ever really lost your senses and done anything so silly that you've regretted it in the morning ... and can you share?

Sadly, I have no dirt to dish on ‘Mummy Misfit Misdemeanours’ because I’m a self-confessed control freak.  Yes, I like my tipple but I know when to stop.  I’d never allow booze to let me get in such a state that I’d embarrass myself.  Sorry!

If you could keep a farm animal in your back garden, what would it be, and why?

I LOVE goats.  Sadly my garden is way too small to accommodate one but it’s my dream to have a garden full of cats, dogs and goats.

Who or what inspires you?

Corny answer here, but it’s my husband.  He’s the most positive person I’ve ever met in my life.  After five years of unemployment he still starts every day with a song and a smile on his face.  He lifts me up when I’m down and I’m so grateful for every day we have together.  OK, fetch the puke bucket - but I think he’s the best.

You have a brilliant sense of humour Amanda.  If you had the chance to write a comedy script for TV, would you jump at the chance?

I’d love to write a script for TV and am still hoping that something will happen with the Misfit books.  I know for sure that ‘BOOK FOUR’ has the perfect part for Miranda Hart -so, who knows?

As you trained as an actress, would you consider playing a part from one of your own novels if it transferred to stage or screen?  If so, who would you play and why?

Although I’m very much Libby, I’d really enjoy playing the part of Fenella because she has no inhibitions and just says it as it is.  I wish I could be more like that - every day, I wish!

It's your wedding anniversary soon.  Will you be making puff balls for your party?

There won’t be a big party this year, so no puff balls.  But in 2014, we’ll have been married for 20 years and I’ll be 50 so that will be a big ‘Puff Ball Occasion’.  I hope you’ll be there Jackie, to share a pink cock or two?!

Do you think people come into our lives for a reason?

Yes, I like to think that people do, in the same way that people leave your life for a reason.

If a fireman ever asked you to hold his hose for him, would you?

Of course I would, it would be rude not to.  (titter, titter!)

Did you ever get expelled from school and, if so, why?

Nope, never got expelled because I was a ‘good girl’!  The head-mistress did send a letter home once, though, saying that I was on a warning as I’d been out of school to buy chips.  My dad just laughed and said that if that was the worst thing I ever did, she could get stuffed.  I loved my dad!

Do you think it's about time you gave up smoking, or do you want to be a fag hag forever?

Ah Jackie, I think you and I may have different interpretations about the meaning of the term ‘fag hag’.  A ‘fag hag’ to me is a lady who likes the company of homosexual gentlemen.  Which I do!  But yes, I smoke, so I am a bit of a hag and YES, OK I SHOULD GIVE UP!!!!!!

When you win the Euro Millions, what is the first thing you will buy and why?

A bottle of champagne to get over the shock - then pay off all our debts and sleep for a month on a desert island.

You write funny books, but do you read lots of humorous books yourself?

I love a book that gives me a chuckle - there’s so much misery in life, why not?

Who is your favourite author?

Ah, thanks Jackie, we end on another tricky one!  Here goes:  Lisa Jewell, Maeve Binchy, Penny Vincenzzi, Catherine Alliott, Jane Fallon, Jill Mansell, Annie Sanders, Jilly Cooper (in the old days), Veronica Henry, Sophie Kinsella and my lovely Indie friend, Michelle Betham.

Huge thanks to Jackie for such great questions at such short notice.  Anyone else want to hit me with some?  Let me know.

 NOW HEAD OFF AND CHECK OUT MY BOOKS ON AMAZON OR LULU - JACKIE SAYS SO!!!